I like swimming.
Way much better than jogging.
Swimming Lessons
My parents believed that swimming is an important life skill and so, my brother and I were made to take swimming lessons at Toa Payoh Swimming Complex some 40+ years ago. Back then, I did not like it. Lessons were held on early Sunday mornings and it was more often than not, c-o-l-d. I remember that we had to swim lots and lots of laps.
And then there were the swimming tests. Which back then required jumping off a diving board. They don’t require it now. I do not like heights. The springboard to jump off was scary, especially to a short-sighted child. I could not see what I was jumping into. Yes, I know, there is only water below. But still, I’d like to SEE what I am jumping into.
Don’t ask me how high it was. It was VERY HIGH to me. And the boys in the class would jump onto the back of the springboard to make the entire board shake as each of us walked to the end of the board to jump off. I hated it.
I also remember the instructor bringing us up to the 3rd highest board to jump off. It was TERRIFYING. I refused to jump. I cried. He promised that I only had to do it once.
NO. Just NO.
So he carried me and dropped me off because I just could not make myself step off into nothingness.
I lived to tell the tale to my children. And no, I don’t harbour any ill feelings towards my instructor. It was fun – 40 years after it happened. But I am not doing it again.
Swimming for the School
But still, I like swimming. Some years later, I became a school swimmer. No, it was not that I was a great swimmer. As I always said, “In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king!”
Cedar was (is?) known for their track and field prowess. Not swimming. So it was easy to be a school swimmer and represent the school. We never won anything. It was fun though.
Swimming for Survival
Like my parents, I believe that swimming is a necessary survival skill our children need to learn.
And since I prefer to practice the “better safe than sorry” parenting philosophy, our children were made to learn swimming starting around the age of six. If you can get your children to start earlier without tears, more power to you.
If you do not plan to teach swimming to your children, please be very vigilant when they are around water bodies. Don’t be complacent just because they are not afraid of the water and can dog paddle for a few seconds.
Be Vigilant
Accidents can happen in a twinkling of an eye. We need to be vigilant where children are concerned. If you have read our local newspapers in April this year, you would have read that two 6-year-olds died from near-drowning incidents in the swimming pool.
SOURCE: Six-year-old girl dies after near-drowning in pool with lifeguards, swimming instructor distracted and Girl, 6, left alone in pool, died after near-drowning.
The state coroner in the first case said, “Children, in particular, need constant supervision around water which cannot be done if the coach is not able to see them.” In the second case, it was reported that “’the state coroner found no shortcomings in the design and maintenance of the pool. She said: “What was singularly lacking was adult supervision.'”
In other words, it was due to negligence and complacency that these two children died. The blame was totally on the adults in charge.
Adult Negligence
Neither of the children could swim. One struggled in the pool while her swimming instructor, her mother and two on-duty lifeguards were nearby. The other was left alone while granduncle’s attention was fixed on his own son.
Two tragedies that could have been prevented.
The price to pay for negligence and complacency was death. A heavy price indeed. And no amount of regret can bring the children back.
Don’t Be Complacent
It is a grave reminder that we cannot lapse into complacency especially when young children are under our care. Be it at the pool or the playground. Or even at home.
While we don’t need to hover over them, we need to be alert. Let us examine what happened – as reported.
Incident #1
It seemed that every adult assumed that some other adult would be watching out and would notice if a child was in trouble. But sadly, none did. All were engrossed in their own world. Some were on their phones, others were talking among themselves.
With children, it only takes a split second for accidents to occur. And it can happen to anyone. Never assume it would never happen on your watch.
Nearly Drowned On My Watch
As I have shared before, in why our children take swimming lessons, Deborah nearly drowned. Twice.
Big brother Aaron pulled her up both times. The first time, I actually saw her step off and into the deeper end of the pool (it sloped downwards sharply) while I was nursing the baby under the shelter.
She did it again in another pool at another time. I was not there the second time. I don’t know why I had let her out of my sight. Thank God for big brothers!
She does not remember either incident – at this point.
I have also witnessed a friend’s child step off a ledge and into the deep end of a wading pool while her mother was talking to a group of us with her back to the pool and her daughter. Thankfully, another friend’s maid who was nearest to the child quickly reacted and fished her out of the water.
And this is why I insist that my children learn how to swim. And even then, not to let them out of sight when they are just learning how to, especially when they are learning how to swim because they tend to be overconfident at that stage.
Also, every time they want to splash in the sea, I would constantly remind them that the water in the sea does not behave like the water in the pool. This is especially so when we bring them to the beaches outside of Singapore. The waves and undertow are much stronger.
Incident #2
This is a case where it seemed that the adult’s attention is focused on one child (his own) at the expense of the other. And this is why I did not allow other people to take my young children to playgrounds or the pool without my supervision.
Yes, you are free to accuse me of being overly protective. But I’d rather err on the side of caution as shown in this case.
Friends and relatives mean well. But if the person has other children to watch over, the natural instinct would be to focus on her own children than on other people’s children. Or to focus on the more active child than the child who quietly wanders off.
This is also why I do not freely offer to watch other people’s children for them especially if we are going to a crowded place. And especially if I know that the child is not prone to listening and obeying instructions.
I have always been called overprotective, even now. But it is ok. Better be overprotective than have a dead or injured child on my hands.
For those of you who have grandparents watching over your children, may I remind you that they are much older than your children and their reflexes are also much slower? They may also not be used to your child’s quirks and so are less able to anticipate their antics.
Think about it: grandparents with more than 2 children to watch over at an open park/playground. Who will they go after if the children run off or bike off in different directions? Can they even catch up with them?
I live near Bishan Park. There were at least two occasions I remember where I had to help run after and catch hold of a runaway child. And once it was two grandparents hollering at and running after one very active child.
Heavy Responsibility
This is also why I did not let my older children take the younger ones out to the playground on their own. Maybe if the playground was directly below my flat, I would have. But the playgrounds were all a block and a half away. And I live on a high floor. How would I be able to know or respond if a mishap occured?
If something happens, the burden placed on the child in-charge is great. And I do not think they should bear this burden.
Mind you, I am not saying this is the right way. Sometimes, one has no choice. But as long as I could, I would do it and not put the burden on my older children. They are after all children – immature and impulsive. When they are engrossed in their own play, they would not be on a lookout for their siblings.
By the way, falling down and scraping of knees are not the only things that can happen at the playground. I have heard of porn being shown to young boys at the playground by the older boys. And of course, one thing leads to another.
Don’t Be Complacent But Don’t Be Paranoid Either
Let us not be complacent. Accidents can and do happen anywhere. Not just in pools and at playgrounds.
And while we need to be mindful, and not be complacent, we also need not be paranoid. Let us daily commit our children to the Lord and have Him watch over them. Because, remember, He loves them more than we ever can.
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