While chatting with an acquaintance about the struggles many new mothers have with ministry and motherhood, she said in all earnestness to me, “But you set the standard too high!”
Hmm…….
The last time I heard something similar was when a friend was told that the younger moms didn’t dare approach her for advice because they were intimidated by her. She is a mom of many as well.
Really? Do we moms of many children intimidate those with one or two children? Have we really set the bar so high for those around us?
I can’t speak for my friend since she lives in the US and I have not lived with her, but I certainly haven’t got anything together that would intimidate anyone!
I suppose what these moms do is think about the work they are doing with their one or 2 children and they try to imagine what it is like for us by multiplying their efforts by 2 or 3 or 4 times. But it isn’t correct. Sure our work IS heavier than yours but the math doesn’t work out that way.
When the littles were little, it was sheer hard physical work. Because we would have more children who make messes than children who can help clear messes 😀 But if trained well, the olders grow up to be great helpers. Sure, you may have to nag them and correct them as they help you but you start getting 2 to 3 pairs of helping hands. And one day you find that you have more helpers than those who need help!
So don’t be intimidated. We are not some super efficient mothers but just older and more experienced ones. Also, mellowed ones who are able to let go of more things by virtue of the fact that we know these things aren’t worth fussing about.
And ministry? I don’t know how the other mothers do it but I did not and still do not participate much in traditional ministry work. I don’t serve in any Church ministries at all. I would like to but keeping on top of homeschooling, housework, cooking and learning about health issues keep me more than busy. My “ministry” is doing what I am called to do – homeschooling the 7 children, keeping house, cooking, learning about health issues and then sharing what I have learnt with the other mothers out there.
So again I say, don’t be intimidated, don’t think I have set the bar too high. Whatever He has called us to do, He will equip us to do. For me and for you.