I brought the children to the playground yesterday and saw a sight which is very common in Singapore. A maid with her 2 charges – a 3year old boy and a 4month old baby.
The 3 yr old was of course tearing round the playground, having just been released from playschool. The maid was playing with the baby, snuggling and kissing her all over her face.
I suddenly felt very sad – for the baby who should be snuggled and kissed by the mother and for the mother who spends more time with her colleagues than her baby.
I don’t know the family’s circumstances – if the mom had to work or not. But I just felt sad for the baby and the mom who may not know what she is missing. (Yes, I know, better a maid that loves the baby than one who abuses her. But that’s not the point I am trying to make here.)
I know that I would feel insanely jealous if a stranger were doing that with my baby instead of me 🙁 So I give thanks that 12 years ago, we made the necessary adjustments and sacrifices so that I don’t have to pass off my baby for someone else to enjoy while I work.
There are of course, ups and downs looking after your baby fulltime – isn’t that applicable to any job or even ministry, we take on? And in times of frustration, I do wish I could pass the baby off to someone 🙁 But I know that I don’t really mean that. I am very glad to have made the changes necessary so that I can be home with my children and I hope you are to!
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Thanks for sharing this. I’m really happy that I get to stay home and enjoy my baby 100% of the time. I’ve only been a SAHM for 8 months and some days I do wonder if I’ve made the right decision and if I would be happier at work. But those thoughts come and go and I can see no better thing than for me to raise my child fulltime.
Yes, my sentiments exactly. I am often thankful I have the chance to be a SAHM for now. I can’t get enough kisses and cuddles with my babies!
I am well aware that circumstances are different for every family, and even culture. Here in Sydney, we almost never see maids so I am no longer used to the notion of having a carer getting so close and intimate with my kids. This last trip back in Singapore, I witnessed parents leaving their kids in the care of maids in the playground DURING THE WEEKEND….Couldn’t believe it. Family circumstances may not allow some mothers to stay home during the week and take their kids out to play. But the weekend???
I was at the beach on Friday and saw the maids wading in the water with their charges. Parents were either nowhere to be found or they were watching from afar. Like – huh?! Oh well.
The sad part is not realizing what a beautiful gift being a momma is~ even the tough parts cuz it makes the sweet times sweeter. =)
You know, Serene, Infant Care makes me sad like that too. 🙁