Schedules AND routines

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One of the secrets to my sanity in running a household of 9 and homeschooling the 7 children is having both schedules AND routines in place. Having implemented them have helped to eliminate many day-to-day hassles,

I am one who generally prefers to know what lie ahead rather than fly by the seat of my pants. This preference did cause some distress when I first had a baby since babies have personalities of their own and don’t always follow the schedules and routines we set for them. 🙂

Schedules AND  Routines

So, that forced me to relax a teeny weeny bit. Then, as the Lord added more and more children, I was nudged to relax more or go crazy trying to control every aspect of our lives. Yet ironically, with that many young children under my care, I needed schedules and routines even more than ever.

Together, schedules and routines became a great tool that allowed me to run the household in a smoother manner. As a side benefit that I did not see coming, the children also enjoyed the predictability of things. It made them feel secure.

Scheduling Alone Can Be Rigid

In the beginning, I had a fixed schedule which I really loathed to deviate from. I took a leaf out of Steve and Teri Maxwell’s Managers of Their Homes book. Although I have learnt much from the book and highly recommend it to young moms who are struggling to manage household matters and homeschooling on their own, I have to confess : I could not schedule my day in 30 minute slots. It was way too rigid for me and for us.

I don’t know how Teri did it but in my home, with 3 young children aged 5 and under, it was impossible to run a home with fixed timings. There was a lot of interruptions – diaper changes, potty training, wiping up messes little people create, disciplining….

The clock at one point became my master not a tool to be used. So, I moved from schedules (with fixed times) to routines.

Routines provide flexibility

I liked the predictability that a schedule brings but I did not like the rigidity of it. And what is the point of setting up a schedule if I am not going to adhere to it 90% of the time? So I read up some more and discovered that I can combine both a schedule and routine to create a happy place.

I could schedule certain events to happen at certain times but leave the other events to just flow with no time constraints.

Fix meal and sleep times

So, I started off by fixing meal and sleep times since one affects the other. Having regular meal and bedtimes make for healthier and happier children!

Read: The Body Clock: Eating Schedule is Equally Important as Sleep Cycle

Next, I slot in what is important and necessary to our family, such as homeschooling and chores.

So, since I like us to eat our breakfast at 8am, lunch at noon and dinner at 6pm, these events anchor our day. Bedtimes are fixed but staggered according to age, starting at 8:30pm for the youngest to 9:30pm for the oldest.

Everything else just flows

Once breakfast is cleared up, we start homeschooling. Each sets his/her own pace. They catch on quick that the faster they finish up their work, the more time they have to do their own stuff.

The bulk of schoolwork is done in the morning when everyone is fresh and awake. Afternoons are for resting and playtime. That is also when I finish grading their work and get my internet fix.

Evenings are totally for playing. But as the children get older, I forsee that a part of our afternoons have to be set aside for schoolwork as well.

When the children were younger, I stuck very strictly to meal and bedtimes. Hungry children are grumpy children and a child who stays up past his bedtime is a child who will have a meltdown. Unpleasant for all.

Routines are not cast in stone

Our schedules and routines have been tweaked many, many times to suit the changing needs of the family. Every time there is a change in the family dynamics, it would be modified, and sometimes drastically changed.

My schedule and routine when I had all littles had to change when we started homeschooling. And of course when the Lord blesses us with a new baby, I would have to change it again.

But having both a schedule and a routine meant that we have a rhythm to our lives. Things flow from one to another. Having a schedule (fixed time) meant that I knew just how long I had to hold out before nap time came! It helped me not go crazy on those horrid days where no one (including the weather) cooperates!

The clock at that point in time is not only a tool but becomes my lifesaver – It’s almost 2:30pm! I can hold out for 30 more minutes before it is naptime and I get a break!

Life is more peaceful.

A sampling of our day

Here is what is looks like at this point in time.

Every morning, we wake up, take a quick shower, have breakfast, clean up and do school. The sequence of things is always the same regardless of what time we (or me!) wake up. Even if we go out for breakfast, we’ll just do school when we’re back.

Living with a routine has also meant that we seldom have to fight with the younger children about meal and nap times. The toddler knows that she naps after lunch. Period. And she also knows that she can’t expect me to play with her when we are doing school in the mornings.

Routines have served us well. If we should suddenly have to interrupt our routine, it is ok. Alright – I may not be happy, but it is ok. We just pick up where we left off.

UPDATE

As the children grew up, I have moved more and more towards routines rather than schedules. Meal and bedtimes are no longer fixed. Everything is more fluid. We eat breakfast around 8am, lunch around 1pm, and dinner around 6:30pm. Bedtimes are around 9pm for the younger lot and whenever for the older teens. Things change as dynamics change.

Try it and see

I understand that some people have an adverse reaction to the words “schedule” and “routine” and want to stay far away from them, preferring spontaneity.

Let me ask you – how is it going for you?

If things are getting done and your family is thriving, GO FOR IT!

But if you are feeling defeated and the children are always ornery, what have you got to lose by giving schedules and routines a try?

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Resources to help you get your routines started

 
***Post Updated 19th August 2017***
 

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