Do you have margins in your life? Or is your life and schedule packed to the brim?
No, margins are not the same as the famous ME TIME that mothers love to talk about. I am talking about making margins, space, in your life so that you are not slotting every hour you have with stuff to do, back-to-back.
White Spaces
When I started homeschooling many years ago (12 if you are counting!) I came across the book, MARGIN by Richard Swenson. You can get a copy at Book Depository (free shipping worldwide!) or at the local library. His advice is basically not to jam pack our schedules. But instead, to leave margins or room in our schedules and routines. Not just for emergencies, but simply for life to be lived and experienced, not rushed through.
Think about a book. Would you prefer to read a book whose words covered the entire page with no breaks, or a book with generous white space at the sides and in between paragraphs? The latter, right? Less tiring on the eyes and you generally feel less flustered. Or if you sew, think about leaving enough margins at the seams so that the seams will not tear.
And so, life ought to have margins, white spaces, too.
Be Intentional
This reminder came to mind recently as I was doing a semi-declutter of the school cupboards to make space for the new books and to sell off/give away books that we no longer use. I had planned everything out to the dot on my planner. Start at 9:30 am, work through for two solid hours, then cook and eat lunch. Then continue to the end from 2 to 5pm. Cook and eat dinner. Then do a thorough vacuum and mop (with Scooba) of the entire living and dining areas. My plan looked simple enough on paper and I didn’t think I had underestimated my ability to declutter the cupboard in about 5 hours.
But I did not make space for any margins. I forgot to take into account that I am no longer as young or as energetic as I was 10 years ago, or even 2 years ago, for that matter. Yes, I did not set aside margins for getting tired. Margins for being interrupted to help a child who needed more guidance on food preparation, a job she has recently taken over. And did I mention that I forgot about setting aside margins for resting?! In my planning and scheduling for the day, I forget that as I grow older, my “batteries” aren’t as resilient! Here, we say all the time that we are like very old handphone batteries which though fully charged up lasts for a shorter and shorter time compared to when we first buy our phones!
I digress. Yeah. Lack of margins.
And so, the task was not completed on time or actually completed. I still have a few shelves undone but they will have to wait for the next round of decluttering. Sigh.
Build Margins into Your Routines
If you have been motivated to start implementing routines and systems into your lives after reading Setting Up Routines to Beat the Overwhelm and Setting up Systems to Beat the Overwhelm, may I please remind you to include some margins into your routines?
Give yourself more time than you think you need for the job at hand so that you have wiggle room even if it is to just breathe!
Some Examples
You generally eat breakfast in 15 minutes. But set aside 30 minutes for it instead. Or set aside 30 minutes to go through your child’s homework even if you think 20 minutes will do. This way, if anything crops up (you spill your coffee, your child really does not understand the Maths question), you don’t have to stress out. You have wiggle room.
Definitely give yourself lots of margin when planning outings with young children. They always take longer than you think to leave the house or the playground. And you never know what the traffic conditions are like.
More margins, less stress.
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Beat the Overwhelm
Setting up Routines to Beat the Overwhelm
Setting up Systems to Beat the Overwhelm