After weaning my first born deliberately after he turned 1 (he weaned completely at 13mths), I had always wanted to nurse each of my children for a minimum of two years. BUT so far, I have not been granted this request!
So far they have weaned at 14mths, 12mths, 16mths and 22mths, respectively. They had all weaned when I was in my 2nd trimester of the next pregnancy. Except for the 4th pregnancy, I could not take the discomfort (an understatement!) of nursing through a pregnancy! I always do fine in the first trimester (except with my 6th pregnancy) but once I hit my second trimester, I cringe everytime the child latches on.
So how do I wean them? Firstly, I pray! Yes, this is serious. Since we trust God with the number and spacing of the children He blesses us with, He knows how long they need to nurse.
So I pray and ask Him to start the process of weaning. Then I would do the commonly suggested “Don’t offer, don’t refuse” strategy. Usually by then the milk supply would have dropped drastically and the child would increase his intake of table food substantially.
The demand for milk as a food source is no longer there. He usually would then nurse just before sleeping/napping. I will slowly encourage them to drink some water instead of milk. Some protest more than others. The nursing session just before bedtime is the one I usually drop last.
And that’s it. The child will be weaned in a matter of weeks by then.
With our fifth child, her weaning coincided with her moving to a toddler bed. She was rather unhappy about the move, and refused to nurse even when I offered! So I took the opportunity to wean there and then. It was over in a day! There was no need for any drama. God answers prayers! In funny and totally unexpected ways. But He always answers prayers!
There was no need to resort to putting chilli, medicated oil, etc… to get the child to wean. I honestly feel sorry for the child who had to be weaned that way. The older the child, the more we should be able to talk him through it and not put the child through such trauma.
Does that mean that if I had not gotten pregnant, I would have nursed longer? Well, I would like to nurse till she was 2 and then slowly wean her. I do not wish to be nursing a 6 year old!
The other things that I believe helped in weaning our children is that I do not offer the breast as a pacifier or as a comfort source. Mama is the comfort source not “milk milk”. Most times they do not nurse to sleep and so the breast is not a sleep prop. These helped is making weaning much more pleasant and easier.